If you struggle with depression or anxiety, or just find yourself in a slump in this season, this video will help you tremendously with learning how to find your motivation again.
The motivation that I am discussing is our inner motivation. Getting motivation back after going through an episode, or episodes, of depression can happen. A few mindset changes that encourage the right habits will get us back on life’s track soon.
I explore recovering from depression through the lens of being a believer in Christ and my hope is that you are inspired to lean into the Lord for your motivation as well. Enjoy!
Yesterday, my dog kept running away from an annoying fly in our home.
She is prone to do this and will even come to my husband or I, whoever will pay attention to her, and bark at us about it. It’s quite cute and humorous to watch.
On this particular afternoon, I was in the middle of editing a podcast episode and laughed as she hopped up onto my lap trying to escape this little fly. She refused to budge and my laughter only increased as the absurdity of her fear was painstakingly obvious. Reality is is that she is much more powerful and larger than the threat of any tiny fly.
And it was then that I heard an interesting thing from the Lord.
He told me I was no different in my behavior. And I immediately knew what He was talking about because I had just been mulling over in my mind earlier about something I needed to do, but was held back by fear. (This little something would be so embarrassing if I told you, and so I will save myself the shame and keep that part to myself;)
I knew in the logical part of my brain that I was allowing something that was not a real threat to hold me in place. Yet, another part of my brain, the survival part, felt a real threat and that left me frozen.
My brain perceived a threat because of my past experiences that felt similar to this one where I was eventually mistreated and misunderstood. I was obviously triggered. Reality was that this was an entirely different situation that needed a mature and healthy response from me.
If the survival part of your brain has been stimulated too often, like mine has, your brain might only know how to function out of this mode alone. You can fall into a trap you create for yourself when you see all of your present experiences through the lens of your past pain.
Knowing full well that my brain is still in its healing process, I am able to tell myself that what reality my brain is perceiving could very likely be a false reality. I am actually not under a real threat but safe.
The Lord graciously told me that I was responding to a present situation in this way. I was then able to push past my fear and act as I knew I should.
The positive result of following through with what I needed to do was clearly evident that my fear was indeed pointless and an empty threat.
Was I also running away from an empty threat like my dog was? Fearful of something that was only in my mind, but not in reality?
Yes, yes I was.
I also believe the enemy takes advantage of this struggle we might have. The enemy knows our weaknesses and he will parade around us in the guise of what we are very afraid of, whether that be fear of making friendships or fear of trying something new.
Yet, when we can quiet ourselves enough to discern the difference between reality and a perceived threat in our minds, we can respond in a more healthy way.
We no longer have a spirit of fear as believers in Christ. Let us not allow fear to rule us and keep us from doing what we know we should do.
In this tenth vlog on my mental health journey, I share how I questioned whether or not I had failed God as a result of struggling with my mental health and having to step away from full time ministry. This happens to more people than we are aware of, which I would discover years later, and it is definitely not failure when you see our lives from the Lord’s perspective. We are all on a journey of growth and maturing in Him and stepping away from ministry does not disrupt what God continues to do in and through us. He always has a plan, a plan outside of our own understanding at times, but a good plan for us all!
I have a very strong gift of discernment that intensified for me a few years ago. When that happened I was discerning much more than I could handle at the time and was often overwhelmed with what I was hearing and feeling from the Holy Spirit and seeing through dreams and visions.
And I am now entering into a new season where I hear the Lord tell me that He desires to take this gift to a deeper level within me and teach me more about it.
I reflected back on the summer that I first grew overwhelmed with this gift, yet also reflected on how I have been walking this gift out ever since.
I learned to respond with intercession for many and for even nations when God would reveal something to me. I saw great fruit come out of these times of prayer by the grace of God.
However, the sorrow and grief that is coupled with some of what the Lord reveals can be difficult to carry and a reliance on Him will definitely need to increase.
Today I went on a walk after feeling the Spirit of God begin to stir within me.
And on my walk the stirring grew to a deep grief that I had no idea what for. All I knew is that there was a groaning in my spirit while I was in prayer.
I continued to pray until I felt this stirring lift from me some. I had an errand I needed to run so I decided to intercede while on my way.
After running my errand and returning home I finally felt the hand of the Lord lift off of me and knew whatever I was interceding for was heard.
I also found it interesting that while out, an ambulance was driving across my path leading me to look over at what appeared to have been an accident. I passed this scene twice while on my errand.
Before this errand though, I was inquiring the Lord about what I was praying for and I shared with Him an assumption of mine that perhaps He was leading me to pray for such and such in my life. And then He told me my interceding had nothing to do with me or any circumstance I was in.
I think it is only human to think that what we are led to pray for has to be something about us or those around us, but often times God’s heart is focused on matters that need His attention in that moment. And a car accident would definitely warrant that need for prayer.
I learned a valuable lesson today in using my discernment gift. I learned not to assume that when my heart is directed to pray that it is about my life or those around me. I learned to open my interpretation to include whomever the Lord needs me to intercede for.
I have a built in box in my head that contains my small world with my friends, my family, and myself. And even the disciples in the New Testament grappled with their small boxes as well when Jesus challenged them to loving outsiders.
As intercessors we will be led to pray outside of our boxes for lives we have never met or have yet to meet. So do not be surprised, as God is actively seeking out someone to stand in the gap momentarily, if He pulls you into a moment of prayer to intercede for someone or some event taking place just a few blocks away from you that you have no idea is taking place. There is a joy in knowing that we impact more lives in this manner than we will ever know.
The lesson I learned today was important. It’s not always about us when the Lord stirs our hearts. And I am learning to ask Him a better question next time around,“Lord, are you stirring me to pray for a situation or person in need that I do not know? Are you drawing me to stand in the gap in prayer for a soul that needs help or a nation in distress? If so, Lord use me.”
In this ninth vlog on my mental health journey, I will share how I quickly changed my prideful attitude towards getting outside help with my mental health. A lot of Christians are unaware of how God will and does use mental health professionals to help bring healing. They are not the only instrument He can use, but He will use them to help us. His heart is for us to be whole and healed and I have seen God use different healthy ways to bring that healing about.
I came across these videos on YouTube that have been a blessing and a help for me recently. The channel is called, “Therapy In A Nutshell” and the host is a licensed marriage and family therapist and her name is Emma. She has a beautiful gift of teaching and is able to share in comprehensive ways very helpful tools that can help improve our mental health.
I would not be sharing this new tool I found if I did not find it valuable and helpful for my own mental health.
I want to share with you just one nugget that has been significant for me.
Let us begin with defining cognitive distortion first.
A quick look on the internet and we discover Wikipedia providing the definition of cognitive distortion as “an exaggerated or irrational thought pattern involved in the onset or perpetuation of psychopathological states, such as depression and anxiety. Cognitive distortions are thoughts that cause individuals to perceive reality inaccurately.”
The Lord dropped in my spirit the phrase, “change the way you think and it will change the way you feel.”
And so I asked Him to show me what thought patterns I had, whether consciously or subconsciously, that are not healthy for me. And He answered this prayer through the discovery of these videos that share on the patterns of thinking we can fall into without meaning to that are harmful for us.
Some of these I had already been made aware of, but there were a few more that I was falling into habit of doing that I was not aware of.
Here is a list of the patterns of thinking Emma shares about that can lead to or keep you struggling with depression and anxiety:
1. All or Nothing Thinking
2. Overgeneralization (always or never statements)
3. Black and White Thinking
4. Mind Reading (assuming how others think about us)
5. Catastrophizing (what if…)
6. Emotional Reasoning (when your feelings do not accurately reflect your reality)
7. Labeling (labeling self or others based on behavior)
8. Mental Filtering (dwelling only on the negative/criticism)
9. Personalization (everything is about you, taking things personally)
10. Unreal – Ideal (comparison with others)
As I find more healing with my mental health and past trauma, I still find myself struggling with bad habitual ways of thinking that reinforce depression and anxiety.
I strongly believe in the importance of healing wounds in our souls and hearts in order for us to find more peace and freedom, as well as, being delivered from mindsets that contain lies from the enemy.
However, in order to move forward we also have to learn how to think with a new and healthy mindset, replacing the old habitual thinking patterns and the deception.
If I can pinpoint something I am doing and label it, along with identifying it as an unhealthy way to think, then I can be better at taking that thought pattern captive. We cannot change what we do not know is causing us mental damage.
I will admit that I tend towards number six on the above list where my emotions and feelings dictate a reality that is not true. When I heard about this cognitive distortion in particular, I realized that I often fall victim to this.
Being able to label what thinking pattern I am falling under in a given moment has been super helpful for me to cease thinking in that way. And the truth of how our emotions indeed follow our thought processes, leaves me understanding of why I am actually feeling a lot more joy even within stressful situations.
I also tend to dwell on the negative that has happened in my past and I realize that this pattern of “mental filtering” is not productive for me at all. There are times we need to process our past and pain in order to move forward in healing, but to continue to allow those thoughts to roll around in our minds way too often will affect our moods.
Keeping those times of processing within set times is helpful for me. Times when I journal and need to process or times when I talk with my counselor. And in order for me not to allow those memories to impact the rest of my day, I do a mental activity taught to me by my counselor of bottling it up and putting it away until our next meeting time.
Another freedom I found in the simplicity of practical tools found from this channel is learning how to reframe my perspective of a situation in order to not feel stuck or trapped. If we truly cannot change a challenging situation or a job we are in, we can still change our way of thinking about those situations that can free us from unhealthy mindsets.
That’s another nugget for another time. But me choosing to be vulnerable with sharing this is to encourage you to learn how to develop healthy thinking patterns that will bring your mood up. And to check out this amazing resource that has been a blessing to me!
Go check out the channel, “Therapy In A Nutshell” on YouTube if you want more tools like this!
When the Lord is about to do something great in our lives, and mostly when He is about to free us from a stronghold and deception, the enemy begins to fight harder.
The Lord wants us free, but the enemy does not.
And if we had eyes for the spiritual realm and witnessed the battles going on, we would have a clear understanding of what was actually taking place behind the scenes so to speak.
I am reminded of when Daniel sought the Lord for understanding in the Old Testament and a heavenly messenger, sent to answer him, was held up by a real spiritual enemy.
“Then he continued, ‘Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them.”
Daniel 10:12
When I think back over the significant moments in my life where God was acting on my behalf and moving in a mighty way, I certainly can recall the waging spiritual battles that always took place right before what God had planned manifested in the natural.
I am very sensitive to the spiritual atmosphere and I would always feel the back and forth of these battles.
And I admit that I struggled believing what the Lord promised me would take place in the heat of these battles. It is not easy to hold onto what He already said when the fruit has yet to be revealed of His arm at work.
There is a lot of waiting after the Lord speaks to us what He will do for us. And what I find the most difficult is what to do in that waiting season.
We are tempted to not trust the Lord at that time as the enemy is literally trying all he can to pull us from our seats of confidence and assurance in the Lord.
And the fight to keep faith and belief in the goodness of God is very real.
I share this with you because I am currently waiting on the Lord in this season for things He promised me. And the wait can be sweet and troubling all at the same time.
How I personally cope with these real mental battles of my faith is raw. I will journal, I will go on a walk, I will ask the Lord repeatedly to confirm what He told me (and this I do a million times!).
I will cry out to Him when the waiting is too hard and overwhelming, and lament of my suffering and pain till He moves on my behalf as He promised me.
I will declare out loud my trust in Him and how I believe with all my heart that He will come through for me. I will remind myself often of what He spoke to me and of His faithfulness.
I will thank Him for answering my cry and telling me again what He’s already told me dozens of times.
And then a new day comes along and I do this all over again. 😉
This waiting sounds awful, but the Lord somehow understands what we are going through and He helps us in it and strengthens us when we ask Him to.
What would be to our advantage is to use our waiting seasons to deepen our relationship with God. To be willing to converse with Him more and be more dependent on Him.
Today, as I was talking with the Lord on a walk, He reminded me that the battles always grow more tense right before He steps in and His will takes place. And that brought me much comfort because for me personally, the last few months have not been so easy.
If your situation is growing more tense and you feel the spiritual battle strong, then know that it is simply a fearful reaction of the enemy that God is about to move big! Do not give up and keep waiting on Him.
In this eighth vlog on my mental health journey, I will go deeper into the storm I experienced within my heart and soul. I will also be sharing how feeling boxed in within my ministry contributed to my burnout and mental health not doing well. Not living out my true beliefs and ignoring things I valued on a deep level impacted me more than I realized!
It has been brought to my attention by a dear sweet friend that the idea of self care has been moved into a category of simply doing whatever you feel is right for you and that feels good for you.
All over social media there are voices that encourage self care, and there is nothing wrong with the idea of taking time to care for yourself. We need to step back and care for ourselves, this is healthy and right.
However, the suggestions and hints of self care also involving choices made in the name of “self care” that actually produce more harm to us rather than good is what we need to be careful of.
What do I mean by this?
When you make a choice to allow yourself indulgence of a habit that is not good for you as a whole, then labeling this “self care” contradicts the idea of what self care is about.
Saying to yourself, ‘I deserve this’, ‘I need to care for myself in this way’, but deep down inside you know that you should not be participating in whatever it is that you feel is right for you, is not a healthy way of caring for yourself.
In fact, the opposite is taking place. What some deem as “self care” is in fact “self harm”.
Why as believers have we come to a place where we think it is okay to follow our culture’s rhythm by agreeing that a certain activity or choice is right for us?
Who are we fooling? God? Ourselves? Others?
We are fooling no one, but ourselves.
Self care is choosing to believe you have great worth and value. It’s believing that you are loved unconditionally by your Father in Heaven and it’s making choices that reflect these beliefs in your heart.
When I got wind of some believers feeling justified in their decision to stay away from church as a point of self care, I felt grieved. They made this decision because they were hurt by some in the church or they experienced real spiritual abuse in the church.
That pain and grief is not being dismissed when I share this. Church has now become a trigger to that pain and stepping back for a season from attending services is not altogether wrong and bad.
And seeking help for those wounds is important.
However, allowing those wounds to be the drive behind making a decision in the name of “self care” to never attend church again is not healthy.
I have stepped away from attending church at different seasons in my life because I was working through such wounds, but the church is not the problem.
Christ desires us to come together and be His body. There is actually healing that can take place when you attend a healthy church and surround yourself with mature believers.
And do understand that being a part of a body of believers does not bring you closer to salvation or in good ranking with the Lord. It is a choice made as a result of understanding salvation comes by faith alone and understanding who you are in Christ.And recognizing the Lord has plans for you to be a vital part of His body in service to Him.
“Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.”
1 Corinthians 12:27
When we talk about self care, I think it is important to place that even on the altar.
We need the guidance of the Holy Spirit with how to truly care for ourselves. We need His correction when we are just being immature or selfish in our pursuit of self care, and we need to always seek to honor the Lord in these decisions.
If you need to step away from commitments or just the busyness of life because you are exhausted and feel burnout, then take time to rest and heal and recalibrate the pace of your life. And ask the Lord to help you live a more balanced life where you are not always drawn to making extreme decisions in the name of self care.
There is a need for godly wisdom as we navigate what’s broadcasted before us on any type of media. Any trend that leads you to make choices that contradict what is taught us in the Word of God, is not a trend that you should be a part of.
We are to pursue righteousness and holiness in Him, and as my friend shared with me, not a life that only makes us happy and comfortable. We should strive to put the interests of others above ourselves.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.”
Philippians 2:3-4
The life that seeks to please the Lord will not be easy and comfortable at times, but it is a life that brings us joy and freedom and true peace.
God knows what is best for us more than we know ourselves. He wants us to care for ourselves, but not at the cost of hurting our relationship with Him, others and ourselves.
In this seventh vlog on my mental health journey, I will continue to share God rebuilding my foundation in Him and how that reflects His loving nature for us. God might allow storms to enter our lives, but He never abandons us within those storms!
