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Identifying shame, guilt and projection…

Shame is a complicated thing when you have received its scorn a great deal in your childhood, adolescence and even young adulthood. It becomes more challenging to navigate your own emotions when it centers around guilt, false guilt, projection of shame onto you from others and when you actually have done something wrong.

Bringing up this whole topic is important so you can discern what you are actually struggling with. Asking the Lord to help you in this and bring you healing as well!

When my husband and I were first married we both had placed an unrealistic expectation on our relationship to be picture perfect. It wasn’t a spoken expectation, but later we would admit to one another what we held within our hearts. This pressure to be perfect as a couple put unnecessary stress and tension on our relationship that kept us from being able to just relax in it.

It wasn’t until we learned how most married couples, even couples in ministry, also had conflict like we were that we realized we needed to give ourselves grace. Two people coming together as one family unit takes a lot of work.

As long as both people in the marriage choose to remain teachable and humble with one another the relationship will become strong.

I have grown to see my marriage as a tool God uses to reflect back to me where I need to heal, grow and mature. And for my husband it is the same. It is within our marriage relationship where we both are made aware of our own heart issues and when we are being selfish, overly critical and un-kind at times.

With a perspective like this we can abandon the perfected vision we have in our minds of marriage, one without conflict or hardship, and truly give one another and ourselves grace.

This also keeps any cycle of shame we could find ourselves drowning in from overtaking our hearts. It makes room for true growth, repentance when we wrong one another and developing a deeper love amongst us we never thought we could have.

There is so much deception in our world and I believe it will only ramp up. The enemy, it feels like, is pulling out all the stops to lure believers away from truth and from their devotion to the Lord.

God gave me a dream to show me just how difficult it has become to discern the counterfeit from the truth. We need to ready ourselves by continuing to walk close with the Lord, know the Bible for ourselves and practice discerning good from evil.

Ask God for more discernment and wisdom!

Have you had an “out of the frying pan and into the fire” experience? This line, a very old proverb that titles the sixth chapter of The Hobbit, perfectly describes how Gandalf, the dwarves and one little hobbit flee out of the grasp of horrid mountain goblins only to find themselves now running from wolves and the orcs that have been pursuing them for days.

When I first heard that infamous phrase, I resonated with it, having experienced such emotional crises in my life. When we walk through multiple challenging issues like this, it can leave us feeling we are the only ones struggling this way. And feeling this way can lead us to isolate and withdraw. But let me be the first one to share with you, if you have not heard already, we all experience life in such a way. We all feel at times how the overwhelm and stresses can be unending.

This is not meant to minimize or invalidate what you are going through, but to let you know that there is nothing wrong with you because you are walking through these trials. You are not being severely punished nor condemned. You are not terribly flawed or unloved.

We love a good story where the good guy comes through in the end. We watch him or her come up against enemy after enemy and we hold our breath as it appears the hero has lost. Yet, in the end they make it through victoriously and come away changed.

We never think the main character deserved what they were challenged with. In fact, we peg them as the hero because of what they must walk through. We know they have what is called a character arc, where we see them grow and discover who they truly are throughout their story. And we witness their ultimate victory because of the challenges they have already met with along the way. And it was these challenges that brought them the change and growth needed to be the overcomer we knew they would become.

However, when we walk through the fire in our own lives, we are tempted to question everything and forget who we are. We succumb to the enemies lies and find ourselves in despair. Yet, God is watching our story unfold. He sees our character arc, in fact, He allows these trials to see our growth and learned dependency on Him. God sees in us what we have yet to see and it is through these trials, multiple trials even, that will bring what He sees into fruition.

The pure frustration that can be felt when we realize that we are circling the same mountain, yet again, is very real. I have definitely had to circle around a mountain more than once, maybe a few times, and there is no shame in having to do so.

When we realize that lessons are needed to be learned, and learned well, in order for growth to take place within us, then we will not be tempted to become a negative voice towards ourselves in this process.

For growth and maturity to happen in our lives we need to be okay with and yield to what God is doing. May this video and lesson encourage you in your journey of healing and growth!

You will never go wrong if you continue a pursuit to love the Lord more and to allow His love for others to grow your love for them as well.

I’ve seen believers pursue after spiritual giftings, anointings, knowledge and platforms, but those who pursue the heart of God and what He desires experience true transformation.

To desire a deeper relationship with the Lord, to want to know Him more and His heart invites more of His presence into your life.

And I’ve never walked away from any true experience with God unchanged. His presence will undo you, it will mess you up in a good way. And it will birth in your heart a deeper love for Him and for others.

If you are having a hard time genuinely loving others and desiring to care for them, then your heart needs more of Him.

Instead of pursuing what you can do for the Lord turn your attention to just pursuing Him. Ask Him to give you a heart like His and your love for Him and others will increase.

Then you can’t help but want to minister to the Lord and to those He loves.

“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears.”

1 Corinthians 13:1-10, NIV

It often happens that people find themselves surrendering to their problems rather than seeking out a divinely inspired solution.

This occurs because what God wants us to do to resolve what we are challenged with might be something we cannot understand, believe the Lord for or see as a real solution.

Yet God is releasing new sight to such individuals in order for them to finally end negative patterns in their lives for good.

Let us position ourselves humbly before the Lord, asking for new sight from Him, in order to see and hear what we need to help us move forward in our lives.

Blessings Friends!

Perhaps there are issues rearing their heads in several areas of your life and you are feeling the stress within you intensify beyond measure.

Your cries to the Lord for deliverance out of your difficulties feel like they are not reaching the ears of God and you feel deeply discouraged.

Let me encourage you and help shift your perspective, allowing you insight into what possibly is taking place and therefore what the Lord has in mind for you as you weather this storm.

As believers in Christ, we are chosen to be His ambassadors here on earth in this lifetime. We are not promised a smooth and easy life just because we have given our lives to the Lord.

On the contrary, we are at times led to enter into tough seasons for our growth in Him in order to be true representatives of God to those around us.

Paul writes in 2 Corinthians a familiar passage for most of us:

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.”

2 Corinthians 4:7-11 NIV

I would like to pull our attention towards verses 10 and 11:

“We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.”

2 Corinthians 4:10-11

When Paul shares how we are given over to death he is referencing what he described earlier in this passage when sharing how we are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed and so on. He is letting us know how the hardships we go through are meant to put to death our sinful nature in order for Christ to live through us, in order for us to live lives led by His Spirit. God is longing for us to realize how us choosing over and over to live out of His Spirit within us, is us awakening to our true identity and nature in Him.

These trials, though challenging as they are, must take credit for us growing and learning who we are and to whom we belong. They are tools God uses to pull out of us our true Spirit led nature in Him.

The next time you encounter this pressing in on all sides know that the Lord is drawing out of you the person He knows you to be, living victoriously for Him and in Him.

Be encouraged and allow this growth process to take place. Allow the Lord to form in you who He has created you to be.

How To Respond To What God Reveals To You
An encouraging prophetic word for you…

God may reveal to your heart understanding about a situation or another person and how we respond to what is being revealed to us actually matters.

An interesting thing happened in the book of Acts where Paul was warned by a prophet not to head to Jerusalem. This is found in Acts chapter 21. Just a chapter prior to that Paul shares with his traveling group how the Holy Spirit has been warning him a great deal about the threat of imprisonment in Jerusalem, yet Paul continues to head in that direction.

This clearly shows us that hearing something from the Lord requires us to take time to lean into Him with how we should respond to what we are hearing.

May this encourage you if you hear clearly and often from the Lord!

There are different oppositions we are faced with in this life and like David, who confronted and took out Goliath, we are meant to destroy our giants as well.

Yet, because of fear and unbelief the majority of believers find themselves tolerating what God means for them to take down.

If you are wondering what giants you have been faced with, then identify what you often struggle with and why. That identified persistent struggle is your giant.

However, where we fall short in overcoming these giants in our personal lives, will be the very things that God will call us out to wage war against.

He does this for a few reasons.

God wants us to learn how to overcome in Him. He wants us to see where we are weak in order for us to step aside and allow Him to become our strength in that area. He desires us to learn how to fully depend on Him and not ourselves.

People who tend to tolerate what God longs for them to conquer walk in fear, refuse to understand their true identity and have not yet grasped what they are capable of with the Lord.

It’s an issue of unbelief, doubt and lack of courage.

In the book of Revelation, Jesus rebukes the church in Thyatira for their toleration of Jezebel. And because there is either a fear of confrontation or of what others will think, this church had not yet overcame their giant to slay. To tolerate something is to allow the existence and acceptance of something you do not really like or agree with.

Fear of confronting our giants is us giving permission to them to reign over and defeat us. David did not fear Goliath, though all of Israel did. Israel’s fear gave Goliath and the Philistines the upper hand. So God had to search for a brave and unfearful heart to destroy the Israelites stronghold.

Whatever stronghold you have in your life is meant to be the place you become most victorious over. Do not be afraid and let the Lord enable you to take out what you’ve been tolerating.