I felt an unsettling in my soul towards the end of August. And I felt a longing to pull back and rest and to allow my mind time to restore and heal from so much that has taken place in my personal life.
When Josh and I left Southeast Asia our lives continued at a pace that did not provide me the time to process much of what happened while abroad. And my brain has decided that the holding off of that time to heal has been enough.
Coincidentally (or not), my sessions with my EMDR therapist have turned to our time in Southeast Asia this month. And, although I am grateful to finally face those experiences, I am also aware that those memories, still fresh in my mind, will and have taken a great deal of energy from me to process and heal.
The Lord has shown me some very real promises that He wants to do in my life, yet, my healing from serving the Lord abroad in different parts of Asia need to be taken care of. My choice to courageously face these real traumatic experiences have truly only come from Him. In short, this healing journey, with its ups and downs, has entered into a new territory.
Taking a step back from my work with my online ministry this past month has provided me what I have needed during this time. And it has helped me to realign my own priorities right now as I continue to move forward and continue to heal. Below is my journal entry this morning I wanted to share with you all. If you feel the Lord draw you unto Himself, it is wise to listen and respond. In doing so you will find a gift of deep rest for your soul, your mind and heart.
“I feel the Lord restoring me. He has indeed led me beside quiet waters and has stilled my soul. Rest has been a gift He has given me in this month of September, real and full rest that I have desperately needed.
I feel my Lord Jesus so close to me. His peace and love and joy is contagious! I am so very very thankful for what He has blessed me with this month. It has changed a perspective for me. A deep yearning in me to live out of His rest and peace has grown.
No more being driven with busyness and a need for distractions from my own pain, but rather being drawn to His side and walking in His leading and peace.”